11 questions you should ask your parents

Many of us assume we know plenty about the people who raised us, and because of social media, there is also a signifiant generational gap in what and how much we share of ourselves. In light of this, research from leading national biographer StoryTerrace reveals just how little we know about the people who raised us, despite them being such prominent figures in our lives.

The research showed that 45% of people say they’ve learned more about their parents’ lives from discovering family possessions, overhearing conversations, or speaking with other family members, rather than directly from their parents themselves. On top of this, 35% said they really admire their parents’ achievements don’t know how they accomplished what they did, with a further 21% stating they didn’t know anything about their mother and father before they became parents.

To help prompt conversations about the hidden stories that our parents have yet to tell, StoryTerrace have compiled a list of questions to help us understand the people who raised us on a deeper level:

1. What did you want to be when you were growing up?

2. Who was your best friend? Where are they now?

3. What was the most rebellious thing you ever did as a teenager or young adult?

4. Do you think you chose the right career path? Do you have any regrets?

5. How did you meet the love of your life, and when did you know they were the one for you?

6. What kind of parent did you think you would be, and how does that compare to the kind of parent you actually were?

7. What did you find was the most difficult aspect of raising children? Is there anything you would have done differently?

8. What advice would you give me now?

9. Do you see any of yourself in me?

10. Do you think we could be closer? What would you change about our relationship now?

11. Is there anything you want to ask me?

Rutger Bruining, Founder and CEO of StoryTerrace, discusses the importance of asking family members about their lives:

“If we’ve learned anything from the pandemic, it’s that you never know what tomorrow will bring. That’s why at StoryTerrace, we believe it’s so important to have meaningful conversations with loved ones while we still have the opportunity. I think younger people sometimes find it difficult to understand their parents and grandparents who haven’t documented their experiences, which is why it’s so important to ask them questions whilst we have the chance.

The pandemic has encouraged many of us to have more conversations with our older family members, and this has contributed to the boom in the number of people wanting to document their own life stories, or the life story of a loved one. I hope that the value we place on preserving our memories continues for future generations, as it provides an engaging way of looking back on our lives in great detail, also conveying how we felt and what we thought at particular milestones and events.

At StoryTerrace, we saw so many people who have documented their life story become less isolated during the past 18 months, having been imbued with a renewed desire to maintain and develop their personal relationships with family and friends. I think this is something that will make us appreciate our family and friends even more.”